This weekend I returned to Denver for the blessed union of two more souls. Three things no one will tell you about going into the Rockies:
1) People in Colorado do not know how to drive. I am not sure if this is because they are guarded and drive under the speed limit, or because they are accustomed to driving up hill really slow, and down hill extremely fast.
2) Boogers – yes, snot, becomes rock hard at high altitude and causes great pain or nose bleeds. Of course, there are so many mouth breathers who chew their food and talk at the same time that the pain is really only secondary.
3) Bicycle riders are idiots. It is true. They believe they own the road, have every right to zip out into traffic, and wear skin tight clothing (as I have stated before, spandex is a privilege, not a right.) As a former cyclist who traversed the Continental Divide seven times (back in 1985) I can testify that they are all fools and idiots.
1) People in Colorado do not know how to drive. I am not sure if this is because they are guarded and drive under the speed limit, or because they are accustomed to driving up hill really slow, and down hill extremely fast.
2) Boogers – yes, snot, becomes rock hard at high altitude and causes great pain or nose bleeds. Of course, there are so many mouth breathers who chew their food and talk at the same time that the pain is really only secondary.
3) Bicycle riders are idiots. It is true. They believe they own the road, have every right to zip out into traffic, and wear skin tight clothing (as I have stated before, spandex is a privilege, not a right.) As a former cyclist who traversed the Continental Divide seven times (back in 1985) I can testify that they are all fools and idiots.
The bride's rental car priority is right on - the new Shelby GT-H (the H is for Hertz) has a ton of testicle power and must have been a blast in the mountains.
ReplyDeleteThat could have also been your solution to bike riders.
Bikers are like that in Chicago. Even worse are the roller-bladers...
ReplyDelete